Susan Spess Shay

Still playing make believe.


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Freaky Wednesday

I got this story in an email from my Walking Buddy yesterday. It’s one of those “Freaky Friday” stories, which sounded pretty familiar until I got to the end. The little twist there made me laugh out loud, and every time I thought about it all day, I grinned again.

I hope you enjoy it, too!

☺☻☺☻☺☻

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home.
He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed, “Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home.

“I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day.”

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man’s wish. The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.

berle

He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the check book. He cleaned the cat’s litter box and bathed the dog.

Then, it was already 1 P.M. He hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, sweep and mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework.  He set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing. At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.

After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed. At 9 p.m. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren’t finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.

The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed. “Lord, I don’t know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife’s’ being able to stay home all day. Please! Oh, please, let us trade back. Amen!”

The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied, “My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You’ll have to wait nine months, though.

“You got pregnant last night”

☺☻☺☻☺☻

Ps: Thanks, Carollea!

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You Might be from a Small Town World . . .

 –if you’re related to more than half the town.

 –if your car breaks down outside of town and news of it gets back to town before you do.

–if the local gas station sells live bait.

–if you know cow pies aren’t made of beef.

–if football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.

I have a real love for Small Town jokes. Kind of like a blonde who grooves on blonde jokes, I guess. Since they don’t have brunette jokes, I’ve adopted these. 

I posted this one on Facebook yesterday–You might be from a Small Town World if you ever used to “drag main.”— and it brought back so many memories and lots of smiles!

I hardly ever dragged main. Whenever I went anywhere in high school, one or the other of my parents (or both) always said, “Go straight there and come straight home.”

In other words, “No dragging main.”
And no side trips.
And no hanging out.
And no parking on South Hill to make out.

*sigh* My parents didn’t want me to have any fun. 

Funny thing is, I nearly always obeyed. Not just because I lived in a small town and knew my parents would find out anything I did before I got home. (Probably before I was finished doing it.) And not because I was afraid of being punished.

It was because I didn’t want to have my parents disappointed in me. (Yes, I was that big a dork.)

Mom opened a dress shop while I was at Ozark, and I loved it. A few years later I started running it for her.

The schools in C-Town had an open campus at that time, and most kids either had a car or a friend with a car, so at noon the marjority of the kids dragged main.

Every school day there was an almost constant symphony of horn-honks (had to say hi!) for the entire time school was out for lunch, and turning onto Broadway, where our dress shop was located, which was also the most highly dragged street, was nearly impossible.

The kids burned hundreds of gallons of gas as they went back and forth on the drag. It was so much fun! LOL.

You might be from a Small Town World if the whole school went to the same party after graduation.

Okay, I didn’t go to a party after graduation (yup, a dork) but if I had, there probably only would have been one.

How about sharing your favorite joke? And no naughty ones, please. I’m still a dork. 😉